Thanks for the Mammaries!

Today I spent most of my day at the Wesley Breast Clinic having my annual mammogram and ultrasound.   Every year I go along and every year I feel the same range of emotions.  So far, fingers crossed, I have been given the all clear and sent home, but that doesn’t stop me getting anxious.  

I start off feeling ok and actually looking forward to a morning of reading my book – forced reading I call it and I love it!   But as the day wears on these emotions change to worry and anxiety, followed by relief when I can go home and all is ok. 

I walk into the waiting room and I cannot believe how many women are sitting there – fifty at least.  I quickly scan the room for a familiar face, don’t find one, so I sit and start reading. 

• First call, into the doctor, easy quick chat and back to the waiting room.  
• Second call, in for the mammogram – what an antiquated ordeal that is.  Boobs squashed flat between a piece of perspex and some xray thingy.  I don’t think boobs were made to be squashed like pancakes! 
  Back to the waiting room – still feeling good – no anxiety or worry. 
• Third call, in for the ultrasound scan – now here is where I start to worry.  Each time I have the same thoughts, what if the lump is bigger?  What if there is another one?   I didn’t finish off the dishes at home?   Who will pick up the dog?   It feels like the scans take ages and each time she hovers around one particular spot I worry that it is a lump.  
  Back to the waiting room – feeling a bit worried now and unable to focus on my book.   Start looking around wondering which of the ladies has had cancer, which has been sent here because of a lump or which ones are just here for their check up?  It’s hard to start though because everyone is thinking the same thing. 
• Fourth call, back into the doctors office – stomach churning.  Get the good news, delivered in a couple of short sentences.   We will see you in 12 months time.    I leave feeling like I have just been given a new life. 

I leave feeling releived, but also feeling sad for the women who didn’t get good news like I did.  For a brief time I got to imagine what it would be like if I was to have cancer and what I would do … whilst I played out a scenario in my head I know that it wouldn’t be anything like the reality.

I am grateful for my health and for every day I wake up feeling good.   If you have good health, you have everything.   We only have one body and it is so important that we take very good care of it.   Be kind to your body … it is everything – without it we are nothing.

What kind thing did you do for your body today?